Self Esteem Part 1
Self Esteem: everyone talks about it, no one truly has it.
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Here’s something that I learned after treating hundreds of clients (all genders and ages) in therapy, NO ONE IS WITHOUT INSECURITIES! Everyone has insecurities- me, you, even Beyonce! And our conversation around this should be shifted just a bit. It feels very much that the general goal is to 100% love your body and yourself. But that isn’t really self-confidence or self-love. Self-Confidence is being able to see & accept yourself for your strengths, and weaknesses, & detaching your worth from those weaknesses. It’s being able to have goals to improve & enjoy where you are at the same time. It’s kind of an abstract idea, right?
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There isn’t a finish line that you cross, naked, yelling “I’m so in love with myself, I’ve FINALLY DONE IT” NOPE! Its more of a process that you can only go through & never really finishes, just ages. Think of it this way: when you are in a relationship with someone, whom you love deeply, do you ALWAYS like them? No! And the same is true for yourself. You can accept some things about yourself w/o judging or hating that aspect, but also being able to work to make your life and yourself better each day at a time, just as you would when working through a relationship hiccup.
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So for this take home, I am not going to tell you to do/ try anything. I am going to tell you about a recent moment of insecurity for me. I had to renew my driver’s license, which also meant taking my photo for my ID. I had prided myself on getting away with a very nice photo on my last driver’s license, so I got all dolled up, & went in there with confidence. WELP it did not turn out well, at least I’m not happy with my photo. And there was a real sinking feeling inside me. Yes, I’ve taken bad pictures before but this is a semi-permanent fixture in my life. In my wallet, being handed to strangers if I go out, or get pulled over. Anyway, I had to accept this terrible picture of me and realize that it is only a snapshot of a moment, with bad lighting.
***Originally Posted February 20th 2019 on LVLHolistic’s Instagram page as a collaborative presentation regarding mental health and nutrition***